05 February 2005

The Uncanny O-Man: Five Superheroes Whose Sexual Prowess I Doubt

[One wonders if Guy is regretting inviting me to play. I mean, here he is discussing race in a comic book and here I am talking about penises.]

5. The Hulk. We all know what happens to dudes who take too many steroids. Hulk smash? I think not.

4. Call me a jerk, but I think Viagra was inspired by Hourman.

3. Superman. Actually, I don't doubt his prowess. (He is, after all, super.) I just wonder if there are any prophylactics that are durable enough.

2. Captain America. He's probably the most vanilla lover out there. Lights out, missionary, no imagination. Nothing like that decadent, upper class aristocrat Iron Man and all his... gadgets...

1. The Flash. 'nuff said.


Guy LeCharles Gonzalez said...

While others may be doing a "Wha..huh?," I know exactly what to expect from you, Omar. And who says you're not dealing with race, too? I mean, you have five white guys on this list, totally exploiting a stereotype! ;-)

Looking forward to the other top 5 lists you have in store. You could be our David Letterman.

Greg said...

You better not make that comment on the Hulk's Internet Diary. He might come over and show you what he can do!

Omar said...

I would just like to say that I love the Hulk's internet diary. I subscribe to the rss feed and everything.

Rick Gebhardt said...

HA! This totally made my work morning worth showing up for.